Weakness

So, when people here aren't ignoring me, ducking into doorways to avoid me altogether or looking down when I come near like I've got a crimson "A" tattooed on my chest, they're discussing babies and pregnancies right. in. front. of. me.  Sitting right next to me, talking about "all my pregnancies were soooo easy!" "Oh, my darling little girl blah blah blah", "well, she took a bunch of tests but it was sooo easy for her to get pregnant", "I keep telling them to give me another grandchild!"   Looking. at. me. the. whole. time. O_o

People are thoughtless, heartless twatwaffles and don't give a shit who they offend.  Unless they're going out of their way to ignore me, then they don't say anything.  I shouldn't be surprised, even when I tell people repeatedly that I do not wish to discuss certain topics, they keep on like I've said nothing.  I want to scream-punch their faces through brick walls - maybe that would get their fucking attention.  It's so awesome how people use opportunities like this to make themselves feel better and walk on people who are suffering.

I get up every. single. day, put on my Joy-is-okay face and soldier on through all the shit that makes me want to crumble, and I'm still seen as too fragile to even speak to.  I know I keep saying I feel so scared of everything, but some of these bitches are such goddamn cowards they can't even look me in the eye.  So who's the weak one?